Audio Interview, Paula Silvestrone, May 12, 2012

EVELYN BAILEY: We're going to begin with the recording.

But are you from Rochester?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Yeah, I grew up in Webster.

And I went to college in Tampa.

And then I went grad school.

I was in San Diego for five years

and then came back just really to kind

of get a jump start my career because things

were really rough in Southern California at the time.

But there's no way that I'd stay in Rochester.

Things took off, and--

EVELYN BAILEY: And what was your degree in?

What--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I had bachelor's in social work

and a master's in counseling.

EVELYN BAILEY: And with that, you were hired as--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Well, I started out

as a social worker in developmental disabilities

at Arc of Monroe.

And then I became more of a bit of a clinical position

at De Paul Residential Group Homes and Apartments.

And then I actually got a promotion there

to program director.

And that program grew very, very quickly.

So I got lots and lots of good management experience

and had a good mentor.

And then an opening came up at the American Heart Association

for executive director, and I went there.

It was a nightmare, nightmare.

It was horrible.

It was-- really?

You know you've got some--

KEVIN INDOVINO: I know people that have worked there.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Oh my God.

Well, first of all, I mean, they were independent,

the Rochester chapter.

But I knew that they were requiring all the New York

state chapters to merge into one chapter.

But it wasn't done kindly.

And the board members were treated poorly.

The staff was treated poorly.

I was treated poorly.

It was just--

And plus, the staff I inherited, they were all like--

I had like eleven heterosexual women

who had been there for like twenty years, who knew nothing

but doing things the same way, who would backbite.

I mean, they'd have these screaming cat fights.

I'm like, what the fuck?

You know?

I couldn't stand it.

I hated it.

EVELYN BAILEY: Wow.

Wow.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: So I lasted a year and a half,

which was a year and a half too long,

but I got advice to stick it out.

And it was my stepping stone.

When the whole thing hit the fan with Jackie--

and I had always had a fascination with working--

I wanted to work with AIDS Rochester, but--

EVELYN BAILEY: Why?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: That's a really interesting question.

I've always leaned pretty far left.

So I was attracted to causes, I think,

that really served oppressed people.

I had had a lot of contact, especially through my theater

activities, with gay populations and just felt

some strong connections there.

And it was obviously a population with a strong need.

And people that obviously were committed to it

were going to be pretty open-minded in many, many ways

and certainly be open to the different types of people

that they'd be serving.

But interestingly-- and this part's off the record--

when I worked at De Paul, Mary--

what was Jackie's partner--

Mary Lou Komarek worked there and--

did you know her?

EVELYN BAILEY: Yes.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Were you friends?

EVELYN BAILEY: Yes.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: OK.

Well--

EVELYN BAILEY: Not very good friends, I mean--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I personally think

she had a severe personality disorder.

And she really could rile things up.

I mean, she'd have group staff against the clinical staff

against the clients.

Like I said, I mean, it got crazy.

And she left there on poor grounds

and was suing agency the and then took a lot of people

with her.

And, oh my God, it was crazy.

So I wanted to stay as far away from her as possible.

And that was really the main thing.

I mean, it sounded like there was

some dysfunctional relationships going on over there,

although I didn't really--

I wasn't that close to know.

So I didn't volunteer for that reason.

But when the opening came up, well, as I said,

I hated the Heart Association.

I thought, I don't even want to be an executive director

anymore.

But if I do, there's two causes that I really

could put my heart into, and that

was Planned Parenthood and AIDS Rochester.

And Planned Parenthood had just turned over.

They had just gotten a new ED.

And then when the position came up at AIDS Rochester,

and there was all that crazy media and nuttsiness,

I'm like, whoa, what's going on?

I mean, people get fired every day.

So what's going on?

And I knew Mary Lou had to be at the center of it

because that was her MO.

And I'm like, I really don't want

to go from the frying pan into the fire here.

So I just held off.

But I remember being at a fundraiser for Tim Mains

and talking with Tim.

And I met Tony Greene there.

And it was four months later, and it was still open.

And I'm like, well, you know, I might as well apply,

go to the interviews.

It's always good practice to interview.

Well, I had one interview, and I got offered the job.

Like, whoa, now what do I do?

EVELYN BAILEY: Who interviewed you?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Bill Valenti, Lynn Friedman, and Hazel

Jeffries, I think was the team.

EVELYN BAILEY: And Hazel Jeffries--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Hazel, yeah.

EVELYN BAILEY: Yeah.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: And so I did my list of pros and cons.

And then I did my list of what I thought I was going to I

need to be successful there and went to the three that

offered the job.

And I said, what I'm going to need

is for you to really stay out of my way

and let me make the changes I think need to happen.

And the board needs to be professional.

And we need to do that.

And I said, "I will give it nine months of my life.

I will give it everything I've got,

and we'll see what happens from there."

And they honored their word.

I mean, they had already done the bulk of the work by--

there was a big brouhaha with the board at the time where

there was like the elections were overthrown,

and all kinds of craziness went on.

So they had already gotten some of the dysfunction

off the board, not to say there wasn't still

some left, but started professionalizing

themselves and requiring that.

KEVIN INDOVINO: What year was this?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: 1989.

EVELYN BAILEY: And can you give me or bring my head back

to that era?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Oh, yeah.

EVELYN BAILEY: What was the picture

of AIDS like at that time?

I mean, for the community--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: There was no treatment really.

I don't think there was even a test yet.

So people were just scared out of their minds, especially

gay men.

And they were dying.

I mean, people would get symptoms, and they would die.

That's it.

So all we could do what make their quality of life

as good as possible and do whatever

we could to spread the prevention word

and to support people because they truly were--

all the stereotypes stories you heard

were true where their families disowned them.

And they weren't allowed to hold their nieces and nephews.

And the trays were left outside their hospital rooms.

And it was a very, very lonely place to be, very sad.

And you couldn't help but have your favorites.

Again, I think Tony Greene who gave me nothing but shit

initially.

I mean, he put me through the test.

You can imagine.

But, you know, we fell in love.

He just basically said to me one time, "If I were heterosexual,

I'd marry you."

(laughter)

We had great respect for each other

because I think we had the same goals.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I want to touch on him just

a little bit because we hear that from a lot of people

about Tony.

And I'm trying to get a sense--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Did you know Tony?

KEVIN INDOVINO: I met him briefly just before he died.

I met him at one of the HPA things

down in Midtown, the the Dining for Dollar things.

What was it about him that really made him

such a force in the whole AIDS care and--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: He had a really strong personality.

He would not let up until he got what he wanted

or what he thought was important, loud mouth.

Like I said, wouldn't back off, but bright and personable.

So the combination was powerful.

Knew everybody in town.

Because of his strong will, he was

difficult to work with sometimes.

You had to do it Tony's way or the highway.

I mean, oh my God.

One thing that's so sad is, until the day I left,

Tony's mother and brother would call me and write me,

"Where's Tony buried?

Where's Tony buried?"

His ashes, I guess.

Because there became this rift between his parents

and his friends.

And he did not love his mother.

His mother was pain in his side.

And so I think this is his ultimate payback to her.

And I just-- I mean, thank God I didn't

know where he was because I could truthfully say,

I just don't know.

And I didn't want to know.

But that was Tony.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I know where part of him is buried.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: You know what?

KEVIN INDOVINO: I know where part of the ashes are buried.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Oh, don't tell me.

KEVIN INDOVINO: Yeah, I'm not going to.

(laughter)

PAULA SILVESTRONE: And even his dying process was very Tony.

I mean, he would joke.

And he would say--

I've got really awful pictures of him

where he was just skin and bones literally.

And he would throw off the blanket

and say, "Take a picture of me.

I want people to know what this is like."

We named-- we developed a housing program that ended up

being very successful without having to actually build

a building.

It ended up being better in the long run, I think.

But we named it the Green House Program after Tony.

EVELYN BAILEY: Yeah.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I seemed to remember that.

EVELYN BAILEY: He had a tendency to be in your face.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Oh, yeah.

EVELYN BAILEY: But my sense--

I mean, I observed him interacting with friends,

with people who he knew who had AIDS.

And as difficult as he might have been,

the compassion and the strength of his belief that you're

worthwhile.

Regardless of the disease, you matter.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: And he was a good role model for that too.

Yeah.

EVELYN BAILEY: The Alliance has a very--

well, it's now funny.

It wasn't then.

In one of our Empty Closet articles about HPA,

we outed him as HIV positive.

And he came to The Alliance.

At that point, we were at Atlantic Avenue.

And he said, "I'm going to sue you guys.

You did this to me!"

And Chic, I think, was president.

And she said, "Now, Tony, calm down.

Calm down.

It was not intentional.

We did not mean to do this.

It just kind of came out,"

Well, he did calm down.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I'm surprised.

(laughter)

EVELYN BAILEY: And he became the poster child.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Yeah, he did really.

Yeah, he did.

And it was always difficult to find spokespeople

in those days.

And it's really one of the most effective ways

to get the prevention message across

was to show real people with HIV that people could relate to.

And it was very difficult to get people

that had decent communication skills that

were willing to speak on camera especially.

But, you know, you can stand up in front of people

and spout off all the facts you want, and it just

doesn't make the impact as when somebody with HIV

stands up and says, it happened to me.

I didn't think it could.

It could happen to you.

KEVIN INDOVINO: And we didn't really

have that at all until someone like Magic Johnson

finally stepped up.

And everybody went, oh, wow.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Well, especially

on the heterosexual side.

KEVIN INDOVINO: Yeah.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I mean, you had the Liberaces and Rock

Hudsons that were kind of flamboyant cases,

or extreme cases in some ways.

KEVIN INDOVINO: So when you took over AIDS Rochester,

what was your biggest challenge?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I think there were two that ran concurrent

and were dependent on each other.

One is changing the culture, professionalizing it

at all levels, whether it was at the board level, staff level,

client level, volunteer level.

Everybody had bad habits--

you know, no boundaries, none, zero, zip.

Well, actually, remember we used to have that house

over on Hayward Avenue.

It was a duplex.

And we had three gay men on each side.

And one of them was on the board.

And he wouldn't pay rent.

He just didn't want to pay rent.

And it was set up right by the government what amount of rent

they had to pay.

And it was like 20 percent of their income.

So it was reasonable.

And this person just, "I have to buy presents

for my mother for Christmas."

And I'm like, OK, work with me here.

Can you pay me ten dollars extra month to get caught up,

whatever.

Wouldn't.

And so I started making noise about evicting him.

And he started telling lies to the board about me

about the whole situation.

And I could not defend myself because of confidentiality

issues.

And here, in essence, this is a person

who's on a group of people who could fire me.

So it just got so sticky sometimes.

And eventually people just needed

to learn that that kind of stuff didn't fly.

But it was tough.

EVELYN BAILEY: So two challenges--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: OK, so there was the cultural challenge,

in terms of cleaning things up, professionalizing it.

The place just physically was disgusting when I walked in.

People were smoking everywhere.

It was dirty.

And people looked like slobs.

And they'd come to work when they wanted to.

My feeling always was-- because ultimately we

ended up in what were pretty nice offices.

And actually I sometimes get criticized for that

because they looked like we spent too much money on it,

which wasn't the case.

I was always somebody that was pretty

good at cutting a good deal.

And I believed that the people we were serving

deserved the respect of a nice environment

and of professional-looking and professional-acting people

to serve them.

I don't think that that meant that we

had to put ourselves in some elite place

that they couldn't relate to.

But I just felt that that was respectful to the people we

are serving.

So that was a big shift.

And the other was simply financial and getting us

to a point where we could survive because we were

in a hole when I took over.

And a lot of people were waiting for their bills to be paid.

EVELYN BAILEY: Talk a little bit about the funding,

the federal response, the state response,

the community response, in terms of financial support.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Well, the state, especially at the time,

was probably our biggest asset.

And they really poured big money into AIDS

for a number of years.

Actually one of the challenges was--

they would throw big chunks at us big grants

so often that it was hard sometimes

to keep up with the growth, both in terms

of administrative infrastructure and just

hiring and training and getting those programs off the ground.

Of course, that came to a screeching halt

eventually, about ten, fifteen years later.

And they were fairly progressive in a lot of ways.

On the other hand, their bureaucracy grew very quickly.

I mean, what blows me away is that the AIDS Institute didn't

exist in 1983.

And by the time I took over, I think

they had 400 employees or something all needing something

from you.

That's what burned me out the most,

I think, was the government requirements,

the ridiculousness of them, and some of the politics involved.

But they're what kept the money flowing.

The feds-- we didn't have any direct federal money.

We had federal money that came through the state.

Ryan White obviously had a big impact,

and that funded a lot of different things, which

was helpful.

But where I really saw a change, and it

was more of a political change and a funny change

because when George Bush, the second George Bush,

got into office, and he started what we heard--

well, I don't know if it was a Jesse Helms thing or what.

I can't remember-- but that no materials or no prevention

education could be put out there that promoted homosexuality

or drug use.

Pretty difficult thing to interpret.

But he was interpreting it pretty conservatively,

obviously.

And so they would create this whole huge system

where any material you used or any speech you used

or any film you used had to go through this review board.

And how do you not talk about those things

and do HIV prevention?

So politics made of a big difference in that field.

Locally, we got a little bit from Monroe County Health

for a little while, but there was politics at the county

too because I had set up the syringe exchange program.

And Bob King was the county guy at the time,

and he wasn't at all happy with me.

And the Republicans weren't at all happy with me.

And we actually had someone on our board

who was in the legal department at the county who

said, whenever your little 40,000 dollars mental health

grant comes up, they go into executive session,

and the Republicans say, is there

any way we can prevent this money

from getting to AIDS Rochester?

We don't want them to have it.

That's how much of a grudge they held.

But they weren't going to be a big source for us anyway.

Medicaid eventually became a big source in terms of billing

for case management.

And one of the first things I did was apply to United Way

here.

And we actually also applied to United Way of Steuben County

and became member agencies of both.

And I think that was huge because, in this community,

obviously, United Way is huge.

And it was kind of a stamp of recognition

that we were a part of the mainstream now.

So that was huge.

And we end up getting some decent chunks of money

from them.

EVELYN BAILEY: And what was the relationship

that AIDS Rochester had with the HPA?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Well, it was grants.

I mean, you had to apply every year

and tell them what you wanted to use the money for and follow

their rules, and they kept changing as HPA evolved.

At one point, it was pretty much CHN and us

who share most of the money.

But there were a lot of other players starting to get

involved in AIDS after a while.

And it started getting really divvied up, I think,

into a lot smaller piles.

But at one point, actually, CHN and--

the event was kind of dying.

And CHN and AIDS Rochester approached HPA

and said, why don't we take it over?

We've got the resources to maybe keep

the event going or re-energize it or whatever.

And they weren't interested at the time.

So unfortunately, that seemed to die a slow death after that.

I mean, what an amazing thing that they did though

in their prime.

My God, the event was amazing.

It really kept people's emotions,

I think, involved in the cause, a great gathering every year

everybody seemed to look forward to.

Can I get water?

(unintelligible) Sorry.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I'm going to ask you this when she gets back.

So it'll give you some time to think about it.

But I want you to kind of define for me core mission of AIDS

Rochester because I know it was very different

than the core mission of CHN and the core mission of HPA.

We're trying to get kind of a clear understanding of,

we had all these different agencies

doing different things.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Absolutely.

KEVIN INDOVINO: So where are you now?

Are you just retired?

Wow, how fun for you.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: It is.

It really is.

I did not think I'd be one of those people

that it would be a big adjustment

for because everybody said it was.

Because a year earlier, I had been out two or three

months with back surgery.

And I really enjoyed my time once the pain

was under control.

The first year was tough.

And I think partially was I was so wiped out from the merger.

I mean, the job itself had gotten

really tough with funding.

And then the whole merger was just

like doing five jobs at once.

And emotionally difficult because there's so many

people reacting to so many changes.

And making sure that I advocated for what I thought

was going to keep the agencies strong.

So I think I was just holding on.

And then it didn't just go away on January 1st.

(unintelligible)

EVELYN BAILEY: That's all right.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Thank you so much.

EVELYN BAILEY: You're welcome.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I was going to ask

her this when you came back.

Kind of just describe for us the core mission

of AIDS Rochester because it was different than what

CHN was doing and HPA, and they were all different things.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: There were really two facets.

One is to provide support services--

in other words, anything that the medical almost,

making sure all that was in place for people,

and also to make sure that the medical was in place

and that it was ongoing, that people

were going to appointments, that they were

able to take their medications.

But oftentimes, with people with HIV,

especially as the disease evolved more and more

into the impoverished populations,

HIV was almost the last priority in terms of what they needed

to address in their lives.

If they didn't have food, if they have telecare,

if they didn't have a roof over their heads,

if they were getting beat up, if they had a substance abuse

problem, then who's going to worry

about getting to the doctor for their HIV or even getting HIV?

So making sure all of that was in place for people

and their lives stable enough so that they could pay attention

to their medical care.

And being the link with the medical providers also.

And then the whole prevention continuum,

and that started out with a lot of HIV 101,

which eventually became obsolete pretty much because the schools

were doing it.

And by then, everybody pretty much

knew how you did and didn't get HIV.

So it was more really concentrating our efforts

on the most at-risk populations.

And that was one thing that drove me a little crazy about

the state is they kind of went through this

population-of-the-year thing.

And that's where they'd be throwing money.

So obviously, it was on the gay population initially.

But then it became migrants.

And then it became women.

And then became something else.

And we're like, that's all good, but they

would take it away or just ignore the fact

that it was still hugely an epidemic with gay men

and needed to stay concentrated on it

because we saw it backsliding.

So I think the AIDS Rochesters of the state

were called CSPs, or community service programs,

as kind of the state designation for them.

We were very well organized.

And we were all the original AIDS providers.

And so we, I think, were a good strong advocacy voice

for the gay population all along, even as a lot of money

started getting thrown toward the minority

community-based organizations.

And everybody in the world started getting in on HIV.

I hate to be cynical, but when there's money out there,

that's going to attract every other service

provider in the world.

And it really started getting fragmented, I think.

And we could not, can not let up our focus,

on especially the gay male population since they continue

and have always been at very high risk.

KEVIN INDOVINO: I'm interested in your opinion on how

AIDS care and awareness moved from a health

initiative to almost a political initiative,

of how it actually kind of propelled

some of the gay activism--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: True.

KEVIN INDOVINO: --that we now see.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: True.

Yeah, I mean, I don't want to use the words silver lining

because that's too positive of a word for AIDS

brought to this world.

But it certainly did gel the gay community

and gel the gay activism.

But from the start, I mean, Reagan's administration

really did ignore the problem and allowed

it to flourish unfortunately.

And The Band Played On, I think, speaks to that beautifully.

But then after that, Bush's policies that I talked about,

the whole sensitivity around syringe exchange.

And that is all political.

It has nothing to do with good public health.

And we're constantly beating the drum for.

But this is what's going to keep people alive.

And this is what's going to keep--

if you don't care about keeping these people alive,

which was just part of the problem

because some people thought let the gays and the druggies

die off.

That's fine with me.

Well, it's going to cost you a lot.

And you know what?

It could happen to your son.

It could happen to your cousin.

It could happen to you.

(laughter)

But constant education and advocacy was necessary.

You don't have that in heart disease or kidney

disease or all worthy causes.

But that extra element of having to fight

for what was right against some pretty

conservative principles in this country is an ongoing battle.

EVELYN BAILEY: Did you have any interaction with ACT UP?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: No.

I don't know that there was a local chapter.

EVELYN BAILEY: There was.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Was there?

It must have kind of died off by the time I came along.

The only-- actually this is kind of fun.

I went to the International Conference

on AIDS in San Francisco in 1990,

early 1990, so shortly after I was hired.

And Tony Greene went, too.

And ACT UP was really acting up out there.

So that was a lot of fun to see.

(laughter)

EVELYN BAILEY: Yeah.

PAULA SILVESTRONE: You know, also,

and I don't know how much this is politics.

It's just people's natural fears.

But when we actually did try to build an apartment building

on the corner almost of Winton and Merchants.

And we looked for a site for years

and finally actually were steered toward that site

by the city but had to make some zoning changes.

And I went in door to door with--

Do you remember Zane?

I can't even remember his last name now.

He was--

EVELYN BAILEY: Zane?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Very involved in the gay bowling tournament.

A quieter Tony Greene, a lovely man.

I go door to door with him.

And people would say right to his face,

I don't want you here.

So we ended up losing in the zoning hearing.

And it was from neighborhood pressure.

Same thing, the neighborhood got organized over this.

And it was actually very scary for me

because there's nothing more personal to people

than when you're going to move in next door to them.

And there was a very, very, very heated public meeting

at East High.

I remember, one time--

always it was very hot.

It was a very hot summer day.

And I was standing up there.

And people were grumbling and mumbling,

and you could see the anger on their faces.

And a fist fight broke out in the back.

And there was some big guy sitting in the front row.

And he just kept mumbling, mumbling, mumbling.

And then I heard him say at one point,

"We're coming out to Shore Drive," which is where I live.

And I got some threatening phone calls.

And I have not had my address listed in the phone book since.

(laughter) It was kind of personal.

And the same with needle exchange, not quite where I

felt like my life was threatened,

but I was accused of committing genocide

because I was going to be handing out syringes

to their people.

And I'm like, no, I'm trying to save them.

(laughter)

What are you doing?

And I think that program is the one

I'm proudest of because I really think it's the most blatantly

effective program that such a quick change in statistics.

And it was clearly--

whenever I would struggle with an issue like that

and I was having a lot of political pressures

and even some people that were prominent in the gay community

sometimes would have their own opinions

and would pressure me to go a certain route with something,

I would just go home.

And I would think, what is the right thing to do?

And my heart was the right thing to do.

And then I was always able to proceed from there

and do what I thought was really right for who we were serving.

EVELYN BAILEY: I was going to ask you

about that because here you are, a woman, and all

of what that means in this society,

working for a cause that certainly had

immense proportional dimensions of health involved,

people's lives involved, yet such opposition at times

and such criticism and such constant barrage of need

on one side, criticism and hate on the other,

how did you maintain?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Martinis.

(laughter)

I'm not altogether kidding.

(laughter)

EVELYN BAILEY: And why did you maintain with the martinis?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Yeah, why did I stick it out?

How I maintained really is that I always

was able to come back to that I was doing the right thing.

I mean, one of the beauties of the way AIDS Rochester

was set up and the services that we provided

is we saw the people we served in the halls every day,

not all of them.

But we had enough lunch programs and groups and this and that

that the people came there.

And I got to know them.

So it's easier to be passionate about something

when you have a connection with the people that you're serving.

And I just felt so strongly that these people

needed a voice in a society that could so easily cast them off

and want them dead.

So it was really easy for me to get behind that

and stay behind that.

That part was easy.

It was never the clients that gave me heartache.

It was always those barriers that

were created to keep me from getting them what they needed,

which was often government.

KEVIN INDOVINO: In your twenty years there,

can you identify a given moment or a given time

where it really dawned on you, OK,

I'm really fulfilling a need here,

or I'm really doing some good here?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I'd have to go back to the syringe exchange

program because, I mean, there were plenty

of moments like that, plenty.

KEVIN INDOVINO: Let me ask you another way.

When, in your twenty years, did you realize, yeah,

this is where I want to be, this is the work that I

need to be doing?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I felt it since day one.

It just always felt like a fit for me, always.

I'd had that one job that maybe that's a good thing

to happen in everybody's life because then you

know what to compare life to.

The people around me--

I mean, it was nice to be a private nonprofit where

I had control over the hiring so that I

felt like we could hire quality people,

and we could get out people that didn't gel with what

we were trying to do there.

And I really felt that from the very beginning.

The fight was in me.

It's kind of interesting, Evelyn, you bringing up

my being a woman.

I'm also a white heterosexual woman,

which didn't fit everybody's idea of who should

be in that leadership position.

And one of the first--

I went to actually to the victory thing

for Tim Mains' city council election or something downtown.

And a couple of women came up to me.

Oh, I know.

I had been interviewed by the Empty Closet.

And they had asked what my sexual orientation was,

and I told them.

And, for me, it was just something factual.

And I knew that people were curious about it.

And I knew that people we're going to be talking about it so

let's just get it out there.

It is what it is.

It's nothing I'm proud of.

It's nothing I'm ashamed of.

It just is.

And two women came up to me and said,

"We hear you're flaunting your heterosexuality. " I'm like,

OK, let the fun begin.

(laughter)

So I had to prove myself at every turn.

It's kind of interesting because physically I'm a small person.

I was very young then to be in such a position.

And I had to prove myself, but I have a strong personality.

And I think that sometimes people would initially,

especially--

I hate to say this-- but heterosexual men in power

would think that they could bull right over me.

And it was like, just wait till little chihuahua gets busy.

Your ass in the grass.

And they'd find out real quickly what they were messing with.

Because what I feel felt strongly and passionately

about something, I just went after it.

But back to syringe exchange for a minute--

when we were deciding whether to do syringe exchange or not

and that--

whew!-- really brutal political battle that that entailed,

I went down and visited one in the Bronx.

And I was just sitting there observing.

And there's all these people lined up.

And there are mothers with their strollers.

And they're all just--

they were very polite.

They were very grateful for what people were doing for them.

And I thought this is everybody's daughter

and son and sister and mother.

And these are all people of value

that we were just trying to give them the tools to stay alive

and to not make them feel like the piranhas of the world.

And so they kind of clinched my commitment to it.

And one time, when I was over at our syringe exchange program,

this woman came in and said, this is the only place in town

that anybody will look me in the eye.

And that just meant so much to me.

I mean, they were people that were loved and valued

by our staff and our volunteers, and they

don't get that anywhere else.

And if you expect people to change their lives around

or even just to have any kind of human compassion,

it's a no brainer for me.

I also sat at many bedsides.

And it's like, you know what?

All the paperwork, all the shit with the state,

it's worth it if I'm easing this person's transition.

KEVIN INDOVINO: You've touched upon this a little bit,

but I think there's room to explore it more about how,

since the inception of AIDS Rochester to today's

modern society, how things have changed for AIDS care and AIDS

awareness.

And there's a reason why all of a sudden

the AIDS agencies had to merge together.

I know you've been out of it for three years now.

But--

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Saw the writing on the wall.

KEVIN INDOVINO: How did things change?

Yeah.

What was the writing on the wall?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: Well, as I said, initially,

all we could really do is help people to die.

And fortunately-- I mean, I wish I could convey to people--

you guys saw it-- what happened in the mid-nineties

when the medications came out.

I was blown away.

I mean, it truly was miraculous.

I mean, we saw people come back from the dead, clearly,

that are still alive today.

So that was awesome.

And medical science is only advanced, fortunately,

not fast enough.

But we continue to make gains.

And eventually, I think the funders have caught up

with that and said, all of our prevention,

everything really now is centered around medical,

not support as much.

I mean, that has to happen too because people

aren't going to get the medical unless they get the support.

You're not going to prevent HIV unless they're

getting the support.

But the medical just became so much more of a focus

and so much more of a key that we had to align ourselves

much closer with that.

And that's what was the right thing to do.

EVELYN BAILEY: In your twenty years at AIDS

Rochester, was there ever a time that the gay community became

unsupportive of your work, of your efforts?

PAULA SILVESTRONE: I would say that the interest waned

a little bit.

And I think that was a national phenomenon.

It was kind of AIDS fatigue.

In the beginning years, we shouted,

and we ranted, and we had meetings,

and we set up services, and we sat by bedsides,

and we went to fundraisers.

And we did all of that, and it was very dramatic.